I admit…I fell for it. The movie with no name…no idea what’s going on…no idea of what kind of monster. I mean I should have known. If they’re hiding it from you…it’s probably cause it sucks. Cause it fucking did.

The beginning gets you rolling just like the trailer did…gets you into it…but then it just turns stupid. I don’t mean stupid like a horribly produced movie…I mean stupid like the characters in the movie were just stupid. I mean if a fucking monster is attacking my city…I’m not gonna chill in the street and talk it over with my friends on what we should do. Then I’m not gonna hang out in the subway where the monster is above me…and could potentially crush the concrete above my head. I’m also not going to let my friends get me potentially killed over some chick my friend had sex with once. All pretty fucking stupid.

My ass is gonna grab a gun…steal a car…and fucking book it out of the city as fast as I can. Not only stupid but short. The movie was like an hour and 24 minutes. It rolled by pretty quickly. And I use the word “rolled” because the fucking camera work is horrible. Blair witch new york. And I understand the “I want to make this real” approach…but figure out a way to make it real and steady. I don’t like being dizzy and turning my head to watch a movie. It’s annoying.

The ending…was kinda stupid as well…but I didn’t mind it as much as the rest of the movie. The best part of the movie was when the credits started to roll…and I heard from the whole theate “I want my money back!” “That movie fucking sucked” “What a crock”. It was pretty fucking amusing.

All in all…don’t waste your money. I mean there are a couple of sexy ladies…but they just walk through the streets and a couple of times running through the streets. EXCITING. All in all it’s a bunch of hype in my opinion. Cause I keep reading all of these great reviews on this thing…and I can’t figure out what they saw that I didn’t.

So for a recap: Cloverfield sucks balls. The end.

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So today we decided to use the tickets for hawaiian waters adventure park that we had left over from when Doan’s sister came to visit. I was really excited about it…because water slides pretty much raised me. Let me explain. From 4th grade until about 8th grade Wet n Wild was my baby sitter during the summer. My mom would drop me off before she went to work, and someone would pick me up at 7pm that night. My parents got as much use out of that season pass as you could get it.

It’s always been my thing though…roller coasters, water slides, fun and fast…I love it. So I’ve been excited for a couple days now. Finally we’re there! We walk in and look around and it’s pretty nice. Very tropical…not crowded at all…but they’re only open from 12:00pm until 3:30pm. What’s with that bullshit. 3 1/2 hours to ride slides…horrible. Well there is a reason for that.

There are only 6 real rides. Do I seem spoiled? 6 rides might be enough for you guys but that’s no where near enough for me. And get this…they only open half of them every 30 minutes. So 3 are open for 30 minutes…then they close those 3 and open up the other 3. It’s retarded. It’s obviously so they don’t have to hire more lifeguards…but seriously…what do they really do. We had a 450 pound hawaiian guy as our lifeguard for the only good ride at the park. Is he going to dive in and save my ass? I don’t think so.

Anyway…it was fun…but only for about an hour. When you have to be told…sorry we’re closing this ride for 30 minutes…and then you have to walk back down the hill…get a different raft…and walk back up…then wait for the 450 pound hawaiian lifeguard to make it up to the top to turn on the ride. You’d get pissed too. It was horrible. I mean our of the 6 rides 2 of them we went on multiple times. So 3 hours of 2 rides over and over again.

HORRIBLE!

The only good thing about this park…you have to pay extra to ride. They have one of those fake waves that you can surf…which is pretty bad ass…i’d love to have one of this at my house. But to pay 10 bones to ride…it’s not worth it. Especially just to have the local lifeguard and his friends…laugh at you cause you’re not a good surfer.

Tickets were like 30 bones each…and then i get half the rides. STUPID…if you ever come to honolulu…don’t waste your money. They’ve ruined my dream. I really need to go to Cali or back to Texas and go to a good water park this summer so I can get the fun back. Cause right now…it’s fucking gone. Goodbye fun…I’ll miss you.

So the other night I was watching MHD which is like oldschool mtv in hd. Yeah there is a place that actually plays music videos all the time. It’s lovely. Anyway I was sitting here, and I saw this video of t shirts that changed throughout the whole song. I have an obsession with graphic tees so this video was so close to my heart. It’s pretty bad ass. So I thought I’d share. That and I just read guav’s blog and he posted a video…and I want to be like him.

I tried to find more about the firm who did it but could only find a lil information about the directors. Here is the higher rez version of it if you’re all about the quality. Let me know what you think.

Watch the Justice – Dance Video

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There’s a lot going on in ’08…starting a new business…getting married…trying to buy a house…”potentially” moving back to Texas…voting for the very first time…and now I’ve decided…I’m not eating any red meat. It’s not hard to make a decision like this when you’re holding your stomach in pain…wondering if you’re about to vomit. Cause that’s how I’ve started feeling every time I eat red meat. A burger…a steak…whatever…it just makes me feel horrible. I don’t get that way chicken…fish…or pork…just good ole delicious meat.

I’m gonna miss you…and it’s gonna be hard…but I think I’ll feel a lot better after doing this. So as of today I am officially a Texas Vegetarian. Wish me luck.

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So we’ve been trying to find our halloween costumes today. We went to party city and gave up cause there were 8 million people there. But on the way home we decided to stop by this little craft shop…to see if we could make anything. The store was pretty crap, but as we were walking out…I saw Beth Chapman.

Doan ran up to her and told her we love her…and of course…asked for a picture. But just like Mathew Fox…a couple of months ago…she said “Sorry…my daughter doesn’t like me to take photos when we’re out”. So doan was shunned again. But it was just random to run into dog the bounty hunter‘s wife at a small craft shop.

The end.

Carving a pumpkin around halloween is just a must. I mean what other time do I get to show off my artistic skills to random strangers outside my house? So yesterday me and doan did something I’ve never done before. We went to Aloun Farms Pumpkin Patch to pick out the perfect carving pumpkin. It’s the only pumpkin patch on oahu, and it’s about an hour away from where we live. The place was pretty cool…well I mean as cool as farms can get. But the crazy thing was how many fucking people were there. Like I pictured 50 people or so taking there little kids to pick some pumpkins. NO! It was nuts. It was like a…cheap bearded lady type…carnival. There had to be 1000 people there, and another hundred or so circling the parking lot.

We took the sneeky route. We parked on the side of the road rather than paying the 3 bones to get in the parking lot. Yeah I know doan has turned me into a cheap skate. So anyway…we park on the road…and start walking into this patch of a farm. I need to add that I hate being dirty. Not like normal people hate being dirty…like…i need 8 million napkins eating bbq cause I seriously hate being dirty. So with that being said. Walking around in the dirt with slippers (sandals for you non hawaii folk) gets you fucking dirty. Our feet and legs were just brown. And not like i’m a mexican so obviously I’m brown. It was like I’m a mexican that hasnt’ showered and pick fruit at a white man’s farm brown. I know. Shity. So anyway like I said earlier this place was like a wannabe carnival. There were rock climbing booths, space ships for the little ones, and for the adults…pink plastic bags to carry all of the huge pumpkins you want. Yeah like this fucking pink thin ass bag is going to hold the 30 pound pumpkin. Why even hand me anything. Have they not seen this texas size plastic trash island? Hand me a wagon to pull these damn things.

So once you pass the carnival type area you’re just in the middle of a farm. Lots of rows of…you guessed it…pumpkins. We go up and down rows upon rows of pumpkins just looking for that one that’s calling to us saying “Pick me! Pick Me! I want to be carved up with a nice and have my insides ripped out!” And after about an hour, we found our first pumpkin sacrifice. So I put it into one of those bullshit pink bags they gave us. And we keep looking. About 20 minutes later we’ve found ourselves at the very back (farthest away from the car as possible) of this farm. And what starts to happen? The fucking bag breaks. Just rips the handles right off. So I get pissed…and say fuck it…there are a million of these things…we’ll find another one…and I put it down. We’re searching and searching. And have made our way all the way back to the front of the farm.

By this time doan had found her pumpkin…and had a great idea to carve Gene Simmons in Kiss on this white pumpkin. But it was after she found this that she said “ya know…I really like that pumpkin that we had at first. i think it was perfect” If you’d like me to translate that for you…she said “Hey…I want that pumpkin you left in the very back of the farm. Go get it…cause that’s the one I want.” Well that’s what I heard anyway. So we tracked it back to the end of the farm…not even knowing if it would still be there. Lucky for me. It was there…still in the broken pink bag. So I created more trash for the texas size island and carried the pumpkin back to the front of the farm.

So now we have our pumpkins and are making our way to the front where there is a long line of people standing in front of a sign that said “Pumpkin Pay Here”. Now I don’t know if they know this or not…but that doesn’t fuck make sense. Pay for your pumpkin here…maybe. Whatever…it’s hawaii. It was when I saw that sign that I got an idea. We didn’t pay for parking…so should we even pay for these pumpkin? I looked at doan and let her know my idea…and being the thief that she is…of course she got all excited and said lets do it. So we walked like were going to the pay line…and then got behind a family that just paid and were heading to the parking lot. We’re sneaky bastards.

So we loaded these bad boys up and I looked to doan and said “The gots no money from us baby doll”. So long story short we’re a couple of dirty brown thieves.  But it was fucking fun. I can definately see us taking our kids to something like this every year. I’m sure they’ll get a kick out of it for like 10 minutes…and then I’ll have to carry them and the pumpkins. Sounds great huh?

Well thanks doan…for taking me to my first Pumpkin Patch. It was orgasmic. And I’ll put up some picks of our carved pumpkins when we get them done. You can see all the pumpkin patch photos here.

This is one of the funniest things I’ve seen in a long time.

Enjoy

UPDATE: So if you already read below…then skip it and just go here. After me praising zazzle…i came to realize they suck. So here it is, normal as can be at cafe press. If you got a better website to make shirts let me know. thanks

So I made this design to wear to wordcamp 2007 in San Francisco next month. And I wanted to go ahead and put it out there for anyone who wanted it. So I uploaded it to Bountee which I thought was one of the coolest cafe press wannabe sites out there. Then I get this email:

Thanks ever so

much for uploading a design to Bountee.com – we really appreciate your time and effort, but unfortunately the voting period has

ended and the Bountee community has not given your Tee-Shirt enough votes this time :(

And this means that we

won’t be able to make it available for your fellow Bountee friends to buy.

We hope that you understand – and

thanks again.

The design that you submitted can still be viewed here:

href=”http://bountee.com/members/design/view.jsp?id=46038″

target=”_blank”>http://bountee.com/members/design/view.jsp?id=46038

We’re really sorry that this one didn’t

work out, but we hope that the next one will send them racing for the YES! button.

And as our grandmother used to

say:
“Don’t be discouraged. It’s often the last key in the bunch that opens the lock”.

Have a nice

day!

Bountee*

And I’m not mad cause they said no to my design. I don’t have that much of an ego…I’m mad cause I don’t think their site is very organized with it’s process. They rely on the “community” to vote designs in, and I actually think that no one voted on my design which is why it was revoked, but I haven’t taken the time to vote on anyone’s shirt. So I’m sure that no one wants to take the time to vote on mine either.

I just don’t think that’s a good model. Designers are fucking lazy. Regardless…I dont’ care, I just thought bountee was going to be a great replacement to CafePress. Especially after all their talks about their great printers.

So here’s the  save wordpress shirt. I signed up at zazzle cause they got a great review from techcrunch. I actually really like their model. You can get any size, color, style shirt you want with the design.

It’s like I’m a kid all over again this year.

Transformers, Spiderman 3, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, and The Simpson’s Movie all this year. I haven’t seen any of these movies, but it’s nice to know that I can be a kid again right now.

I just saw the simpson’s movie website and it’s pretty pimp. You can make your own simpson’s avatar. I had to do a bit of photoshop work to get a lil hawk and beard going, but I think it’s a pretty good character. I can totally picture myself playing pool at moe’s.

Anyway…just random but I miss the 80′s.

late

Okay I’m a huge lost fan, and it’s by far the best show I’ve ever seen in my life. But all the twists and turns drives me fucking nuts. I thought last night’s finale was pretty fucking sweet, but I got a little too drunk while watching it so I sat down and watched it again with the captions on tonight just to make sure I caught everything. Also while watching this I decided to check out what other people were saying about it get some new theories on DIGG. There

were some great ideas on there but nothing matched. I kept disproving everything people said in my head. But I kept telling Shane and Doan these theories to see what they’d think. We went back and forth on a few, but then…it just came to Shane. He figured it out. And I totally agree with him. No one has written anything about it, and I’m assuming know one thinks this at all, BUT IT MAKES PERFECT SENSE. Here are the parts of theory that just seem to be 100% dead on:

Why would Jack who’s off the island feel guilty? He’s obviously drugged up, and says to Kate “I don’t want to keep lyin”, sitting in a room with tons of maps of the pacific, and he wants to crash on a plane and go back to the island.

THE LOGICAL ANSWERS:

1. Guilty that he abandoned all of the other survivors, when getting rescued with Kate. Just like Michael Did. Meaning that the people they called on the sat phone are going to show up in a small helicopter. They’ll say I can only take 2 at a time, and obviously Jack will go with…kate?…and once he’s on the copter they’re going to tell him that he can’t go back or say anything about or x, y, or z.

2. Michael is probably the person in the casket which is why Jack says that he’s neither friend of family. That or it’s Walt. It’s a small casket, and if you watch closely…the first paper that jack has is small and narrow, while the one he gives Kate is wide longer one. This could mean that the funeral scene was Walt’s funeral, and the paper he gave Kate was to Michael’s funeral.

Here’s why I think that as well. I found a high rez photo of the paper and it reads:

” Los Angeles Man found dead…downtown loft The body of J.. anthem of new york was found shortly after 4 a.m. in the..of Grand Avenue

Ted… doorman at The Tower .. heard loud noises coming from …man’s loft Concerned for the man’s safety he entered the … discovered the body hanging from a beam in the master bedroom……according…”

Michael is from New York, an artist so would have a loft, Michael’s real name is Jonathan Michael Chantham. So like I said before…Funeral 1 is Walt. Michael was so upset about that he hung himself in his loft…hence funeral 2 that Jack was curious if Kate was going to the funeral.

3. Kate is obviously not in jail for murder or running from the fbi…oh and bank robbery, which is why she wouldn’t go to the funeral and is keeping her distance from Jack.

The big question is: Why can’t Jack tell anyone about the island? Is it to protect Kate’s identity or life or is there something else there?

Obviously I got more theories, but these are the ones I want to talk about…so tell me what you think and your theories.

OH…on a side note me, shane, and doan ran into Jack today at Muddy Waters Coffee in Kailua. Doan asked him nicely if she could get a picture with him, and like a dick he said “Naaa…I’m leaving” Now I know you’re a big star and all that shit, but how hard is it to take 5 seconds to smile? I mean I get that you want a normal life, and just want to chill, but seriously. Smile, click, out the door…no big deal. Whatever…Jack’s a dick. The

end.

UPDATE: I was half asleep when I wrote this, and I totally forgot to add another “I saw but I don’t know if anyone else did. Well actually Doan did. The lady and child that wrecked and Jack quote/unquote saved could be Juliette’s cancer be gone sister who had a child.  Uh huh…remember they showed that live feed of her sister with her son on the swing. Yep Yep Jack almost killed Juliet’s family. Like I said at the end…He’s a dick.

Rambo 4

Okay I really don’t know what’s up with Stallone right now. I mean is he just trying to ruin everything that’s made him famous. Lets take Rocky. Great movies. I mean how many movies can say they’ve had 4 and a half great movies. Why ruin it with following down old man in american trunks fighting a young kid. I mean wasn’t that what the 5th one was anyway. Stupid.

Now I just found out today that Rambo 4 is coming out. Check out this Video Trailer of Rambo 4. It looks absolutely horrible. I mean, no one wants to watch this shit. It was great in the 80′s cause everything really sucked quality wise in the 80′s. Doing the same kind of movie…which it is…is fucking stupid. What’s wrong with these people. I mean Stallone must be producing, directing, and paying for absolutely everything in this one, cause who would want to be a part of this. Not to mention Stallone just looks weird now. It’s like his face and body have just become overly large like he has a slight case of elephantitis. I’ll get back to you on that one.

Anyway here is the trailer for Rambo 4

There’s something about this place. I just can’t stay away. After moving to San Francisco and meeting the girl of my dreams, I knew we were going to be moving somewhere together. But she was so obsessed with hawaii before I even met her. She’s always wanted to live in hawaii…it’s been her dream. So I wanted her dream to come true. So here we are again.

I feel like we’ve been here for so long already, because we’ve done so much in a short period of time. Here’s a quick recap of what’s happen so far.

We made it in time for Amber and Tyler’s wedding

Shane lost a bet at Dave and Busters and had to wear pink panty hoes down the waikiki strip

We ran into Syeed at Barnes and Noble

I started body boarding and Doan started jogging with her new pimp armband

We went to KukuaFestival with Jack Johnson and Eddie Vedder

We BBQ every weekend

We are all professional Guitar Hero players

We got a bus pass

And Doan started her own food blog

So yeah…things are going well…we’re getting tan and already losing weight. Doan’s really happy about being here, but not about having to work. She just started working at Cheeseburger in Paradise. She’s ready for me to get rich so she doesn’t have to work anymore. I’m ready for that too.

On a side not…have you guys noticed that they came up with a new…skinnier…cookie crisp dog. I think it’s bullshit. It’s probably because the government says that kids are too fat. So lets market skinny people…even cartoon dogs. But what they’re forgetting is the kid will still be eating fucking cookies for breakfast. No shit he’s gonna be fat. But so what…he’s a kid…and should be able to be chubby. Fuck you cookie crisp. You don’t see Captain Crunch going on a diet. Be fat and proud. I had to get that off my chest. Sorry.

Late

I talked to my mom about a week before I moved to san francisco. She told me it was a good move to go there and that I’d meet my soul mate there. Well she was right. I met Doan Chung on August 25th 2005, around 8pm, at Swig Bar on Geary and Taylor Street. From the first second I saw her I thought she was absolutely gorgeous. She came to the bar to see Bea perform. Jackie and Bea were in san francisco for the virgo bash. Since Jackie was from the area she called up her cousins and Doan to come to the show. So if it wasn’t for Jackie and Bea I would have never met my future wife.

I remember sitting at the bar with Jackie right before Bea started her set. I leaned over to Jackie and whispered “I love your friend”. And with Jackie being Jackie she looks straight at Doan and says “RAY LOVES YOU!” I instantly freaked and was totally embarrassed, but Doan looked at me, smiled, and said “I love him too”. I was hooked from that second.

Over the next couple of months I saw a lot of Doan. We would both work during the day and she would drive all the way from Vacaville to San Francisco (about 2 hours each way) just to come and see me almost everyday. The months flew by and before we knew it I was packing my stuff up and moving in with her in Vacaville.

That was the toughest place I’d ever lived. It was a 2 hour drive each way from Vacaville to San Francisco, but that was only when the traffic wasn’t bad, and you had a car. The first couple of weeks I lived in Vacaville Doan was in China with her family. So I had to find my own way to work. My Day went like this. I woke up at 4am, left the house by 5am, walked to the bus stop, took an hour long ride to el cerrito, hopped on bart into the city, then a bus to my office. It was insane and about 5 hours of travel each way. Luckily my life got better when Doan got back. We still had a crazy commute, but driving with my baby everyday is a good day.

We lived in Vacaville for just about a month and we found a crazy space. We found a 8200 sq ft loft in oakland california. It was totally trashed, but I saw it and just knew how beautiful it could be. So Doan called them up and got us a ridiculous deal on the space. We then spent tons of time and money fixing up the space. We turned half into her massage spa called Humble Way, and half our living space. We had some cool parties, and a lot of good times, but we were stressed.

So stressed that we needed a vacation. So we decided we’d go back to hawaii for a couple of weeks. She didn’t know this but I had planned to ask her to marry me there. A couple of months before I was looking desparately for a beautiful engagement ring. I’m not normal though and neither is Doan. So I had to have something completely her and totally creative. So a little insight into Doan. SHE’S OBSESSED WITH SUGAR! I don’t say that lightly. She seriously eats sugar every second that she can, orders dessert for her appetizer, and can’t let ice cream sit in the freezer for more than a day. She’s sugar crazy. And since I wanted her engagement ring to be all about her. I had to find a sugar themed ring. I spent weeks looking around, and finally I found Holly Cruise’s website. She had a series of jewelry that was nothing but cake with frosting. I had to have it.

I wrote Holly telling her my situation and getting some prices. She said what size is she? I had no idea. I spent the next week going through Doan’s jewelry boxes trying to find something. And nothing was any help. Holly was really cool about it. She said she had a size 8 which was obviously going to be too big, but I’d have it at least. She said after you find out her size, just send it back and she’ll make me a custom one perfect size for Doan.

So I had it sent to the office, and even had to have Beau buy it for me because Doan is checking the bank everyday and asking me about transactions. So I knew she’d know something was up. Finally we were off on our trip. We did all the usual stuff: hiking, swimming, tanning, eating and of course drinking. It was fun as can be. We stayed with my friend Shane who asked me when we got there if I was nervous about asking her. I looked at him and said “Not at all. I think people that are scared are worried if they’re making the right decision. I KNEW I was making the right decision.”

So a few days go by, and we go to the beach that I planned on asking her at. We went with our friends Amber and Shane. We were having a good time just walking around when we found this cool sand tunnels that kids must have made. These were huge with tunnels that went from all ditch to ditch for about 10 yards. Without even thinking I told Doan she should go crawling through. Being the crazy asian she is…she jumped down there and started trying to crawl through them. It was hilarious. So we jumped to the next ditch and this one she could totally fit in the tunnel. I’m not sure why, but I thought it would be funny if while she down there…I made the sand fall on her back and trapped her down there. ( it seemed brilliant in my head) Well I made the sand crash too early and it landed on her face covering her whole head. I FREAKED! I was so scared, I jumped down there and started dig out around her face so she could breathe. Amber and Shane freaked and started digging her out from the back. We finally got her out. She was so scared and I felt like shit. It was the worse feeling I’d ever had in my life. And on the beach I wanted to ask her to marry me on no doubt.

Everything calmed down and we started home. I asked her if it would be okay if we had a picnic at that beach tomorrow. I told her I didn’t want everytime I think about my favorite beach, that I think about the time I almost killed my girlfriend. She agreed and I knew tomorrow was going to be the biggest day of my life.

We woke up early the next day (February 23rd 2007) and headed for Kailua. We stopped at the Kalapawai Market and got some food for our picnic. It was still pretty early when we got to lanakai, which means that it was basically a beach all to ourselves. We found a little cove at the end of the beach that was almost covered so we were all to ourselves.

We ate our food and then decided to just lay down and cuddle. We were laying there watching the waves, and I knew it was time to ask. So I whispered in her ear “Stand up baby”. She replied with “Why would I stand up, I don’t want to stand up, I’m perfectly fine laying here” I realized then this wasn’t going to be easy and as planned. So we layed there a bit more and I kissed her neck, and whispered in her ear “Doan……will you marry me” she replied jokingly with “Where’s my ring” I looked at her eyes, smiled, and said “It’s in my pocket”. I asked her again to stand up and this time she finally did. She started to freak out a bit, and I pulled the ring out. I said “Doan Chung…will you marry me” There was a long pause, and as soon as I started to get worried she finally said “Yes”. We hugged, kissed, cried, and laid back down holding each other on what will forever be OUR BEACH.

We took some pictures and even took a picture of the house that we were in front of. The people were coming out of the house and probably thought we were crazy. That or going to kill them. Either way it was funny. We spent the next few days in paradise, deciding that we were going to move back and be married in hawaii. So I’m writing this not on the day I asked her to marry me. But the day that I gave my 2 weeks notice to my job. So in 2 weeks on Friday the 13th I’ll be flying back to hawaii to enjoy paradise with my new fiance. I’d normally say wish me luck, but like I said earlier. I’m not worried about me and Doan. We were meant for each other.

The end.

Greatest video EVER!

As most of you know I’m not a big fan of politics. I hate dealing with it just cause of the fakeness behind it. Politicians tend to just lie. They’ll lie to you to get you to agree with them…and do whatever they can just to get your vote. They say yes I am totally against that and I’d never do that…if you elect me. But as soon as they’re in office you have no idea what they’ll do. It’s scary.

I have the same feelings about the military. I mean I’m glad there are people out there that want to go out there and protect america, but I’m not a fan of the military government. I feel that they’re just like politicians. They just tell you what you need to hear so you’ll join their team. Lots of promises.

Well I just saw this video that made me feel that I’ve made the right decisions, and that my personal beliefs are now shared by a lot of people that have actually been in the military. It’s worth a watch.